


My Boy

by bobbysghost



Category: Billie Eilish, Iron Man - Fandom, The Avengers, Tony Stark - Fandom
Genre: Angst, F/M, Sad Ending, Tony Stark Has Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-04
Updated: 2018-03-04
Packaged: 2019-03-27 03:38:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,964
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13872321
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bobbysghost/pseuds/bobbysghost
Summary: Angsty songfic based of Billie Eilish 'My Boy'





	My Boy

My boy’s being sus, he was shady enough,

But now he’s just a shadow.

 

The early months of your relationship were a whirlwind of sun, sex and stolen kisses, giggles and fancy parties, a flurry of champagne and white linen sheets. Running from the paparazzi had once been an exciting part of yours and Tony’s love, but soon it became a chore, something that you dreaded doing, which inevitably led to the decline in happiness as the relationship continued.

This wasn’t too bad. You could still have ‘dates’ in the Avenger’s Tower. The large, private cinema was perfect for said occasions, as were the hot tub and sauna. However, you missed being able to go out. You longed to hold his hand and show your affection in public, inwardly crying out when Tony recommended you travel in separate cars to his opening of a new Mechanics Exhibition or an awards ceremony (which he hated going to anyway).

This had all led up to now, leaving you sitting on your bed in the private apartment, just waiting for the sounds of his heavy footsteps telling you he was coming to join you. They didn’t appear. They never came anymore. All you heard was the tinkering coming from the lab, and the occasional drop of a tool which came with a loud clang and a hushed "Shit!", but no indication he was coming to bed.

That was where he spent most of his time.

 

My boy loves his friends, just like I love my split ends.

And by that I mean,

He cuts them off.

 

"Y/N, have you spoken to Tony lately?" 

You and Bruce were having breakfast together, after another long night of achingly waiting for Tony to come to bed. You glanced up at him, an eyebrow raised and a small, sad smile on your face.

"No, not really." you said meekly, trying to hide your sadness by pushing another bite of toast through your lips and concentrating on that instead.

Bruce sighed, "Nor have I," he pushed his glasses up his nose as he took a sip of his tea, looking concerned, "it's almost like he's avoiding us. Steve's noticed it too."

You nodded. You'd observed how Tony had distanced himself from his friends. He first stopped with the nicknames, Steve going from being called 'Capsicle!' and being bombarded with old man jokes to Tony barely even calling him 'Rogers'. The tension between them had thickened, causing Tony to retreat even further into his lab and Steve to stop visiting you, which made you feel like you'd lost a friend as well. Bruce knew that Tony shunned away from the lab when he was in there- instead choosing to drive off in one of his many expensive cars until JARVIS informed him that Bruce had gone and you had retreated to bed, which was his signal to come back.

You knew he was ignoring his friends. On the rare occasion you'd shuffled into the lab in your pajamas, ready to wait there for him to come to bed, you'd seen his phone buzz every couple of minutes. Texts from Bruce, Steve, Rhodes and even occasionally Natasha lit up the screen, and you watched as Tony continued to busy himself with whatever project he was working on, oblivious. 

Soon, Bruce just stopped coming to visit.

 

My boy, my boy, my boy,

Don't love me like he promise

My boy, my boy, my boy,

He ain't a man and he sure as hell ain't honest.

 

You stared at the sparkling ring on your finger, sighing as you twirled it around the digit. It represented more than just a piece of expensive silver that Tony had bought you - it was a symbol of his promise to love you for as long as you lived, and that one day he'd marry the most beautiful girl he'd ever set eyes on.

"I can't wait to call you my wife." He'd murmed to you as he slipped it on your finger, and his lips kissed against your hand as he stared up at you, his brown eyes full of love and admiration as he moved to capture your lips.

The Tony in that memory was far different to the Tony you knew now. He was warmer, a comfort in your life. Now Tony was cold, sharp, only replying to your soft questions with blunt answers, as if he had no time for you, the girl he promised to marry. Even on the sparse nights when sleep overtook him and he came to bed, sheets the sizes of states were between you, and it still felt like you were sleeping alone.

 

My boy's being sus, and he don't know how to cuss,

He just sounds like he's tryna be his father.

 

"Who are you, Tony?" you screamed at him, tears rolling down your cheeks as you stared desperately at the man in front of you. "I hardly recognise you anymore." 

"I'm still me," his back was turned to you as he poured himself a glass of whisky, knocking it back in one sip. "You're overreacting."

You felt hopeless, nothing you said was getting into his head. You'd had this argument once, twice, three times before, and it always ended with Tony storming out, and you crying yourself to sleep on your bed.

"I'm not fucking overreacting, Tony," you stuttered weakly, trying to wipe the tears off you, "you're not the same. Y-You're acting like-"

He whipped round and glared at you, his eyes full of anger as he swayed slightly, gripping onto his bar to steady himself, "Fucking say it. I dare you to fucking say it." 

You gulped, wrapping your arms around yourself in an attempt of comfort. You knew you had crossed a line, passed through a boundry at even insinutating that Tony was becoming Howard, but it was the truth. Tony had told you about how Howard showed him little affection as a child, and spent a lot of time drinking and ignoring his wife. Tony always said he'd never be like that, but the similarities were showing through. The videos you'd poured over in the Smithsonian showed Howard as a brilliant mind, but were unable to represent the true man they documented. 

"Fuck you, Y/N." Tony spat, charging out of the room. You heard his car speed away a few moments after.

Later on that night, you saw pictures of him with another woman floating around the news, and you felt even more alone.

 

My boy's an ugly crier, but he's such a pretty liar,

and by that I mean, 

he said he'd change.

 

Your hands shook as you read the messages between Tony and the girl. Multiple texts about what Tony wanted to do to her, specifically what his tongue would do between her legs, and how 'Y/N doesn't need to know about this.'

Tony had begged and cried for you to forgive him, going as far as destroying his own phone and buying himself a new one which had your face ID and fingerprint logged into it. He blocked and deleted the woman, and told you he would never, ever, abuse your trust again. He was adamant that he was a changed man, You forgave him, relishing in the new attention that came with his apology. You didn't think twice that Tony would lie to you after that.

You were wrong.

After searching for an earring for half the night, you eventually started searching through the bed, thinking it could've possibly fallen out in one of your restless sleeps. After pulling back each cover and searching through the pillows, you came across something. A pink, lacy pair of panties. You knew it wasn't one of yours in an instance. In the brief, drunken rounds of unsatisfactory sex you and Tony had been having, you hardly took off your underwear, Tony preferring to just push it to the side to get to what he wanted. 

The words 'never again' raced through your mind as you'd realised Tony had lied and cheated, again. You didn't know what to do. You were defeated. This man had left you defeated.

 

My boy, my boy, my boy,

Don't love me like he promise

My boy, my boy, my boy,

He ain't a man and he sure as hell ain't honest.

 

Wiping your mouth, you coughed as the last bit of your lunch made a reappearance into the toilet. You'd been puking for a couple of days now, but you had just assumed that you'd had a stomach bug. Of course, Tony hadn't noticed. He hadn't even been home the last few weeks. He'd been away in Miami, working on some big secret investment.

You sat back as you flushed the toilet, looking over at the little blue box you had placed next to you with a glare. You weren't pregnant. You had only bought the thing because JARVIS had insisted your hormone levels were raging. You were just sick, that's all.

"At least take it, Miss Y/L/N. It would be to your benefit." JARVIS coaxed you through the speakers in the bathroom. You stared up at the ceiling, sighing.

"Would it though, Jarv'? Tony hates me. He hates our life, our relationship, everything. If I was pregnant, he'd hate this child as well. He's just like his fucking father." 

You wiped a tear which had escaped. You were done crying over him. You'd done it far to much over the last few years. You had become accustomed to the despair living inside of you.

"I would highly recommend you do the test, Ma'am."

You rolled your eyes, grabbing the bloody box and taking out the test, sitting back on the toilet, mumbling "I'm only doing this so you'll get off my back, Jarv'. I'm not pregnant." You did the test and left it on the side of the sink, examining the box for the instructions. "Two lines for pregnant, one line for not..."

"Miss Y/L/N, I would suggest you look at the test." 

You paused, before you looked down at it. Two positively pink lines stared back at you.

 

You want me to be yours, well then you gotta be mine,

but if you want a good girl then goodbye.

 

You had disappeared. No tracking surveillance could find you. Tony had paid every high end detective he could find to locate you, but none of them could. You, and your growing son, had disappeared of the face of the Earth that day you found out you were pregnant. Tony had returned home from his trip to a cold, dark, empty house, except for the positive pregnancy test left on the side of the sink. JARVIS had been unable, or unwilling, to disclose your location to Tony.

Tony had smashed up the tower, sliced up his hands and drank his entire liquor cabinet. Bruce had tried to contact him, but just as before, Tony ignored him and pushed him away. He missed the comforting touches of your fingers against his, the feeling of your lips against his. He poured all of his time, money and grief into trying to find you, because he knew he couldn't last without you.

Tony thought about his child at night- whether it was a son or a daughter, whether it would look like Y/N or him. Your words replayed in his head, over and over again. 

"You're just like your father."

Tony knew that he'd never be able to dispute your words, as he'd ruined any chance he would've got. And it was his fault.

Nights in the tower were never the same after that.

 

You want me to be yours, well then you gotta be mine,

but if you want a good girl then goodbye.


End file.
